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Before I start any of this, I want you to know something.
I’m not selling you a philosophy, I’m not telling you that if you work through everything written here you’ll solve all your problems. I’m only telling you my story and what I did to work through it, and I hope, I truly hope, that you can take some of these pieces and add them to your own puzzle.
Isn’t that what life is? Collecting experience from those around us and creating a philosophy to live by, to pass down, to wear with pride? The one thing we get wrong however, is the idea that we don’t keep adding to it, that we don’t need to keep learning and unlearning.
It came to a head in December of 2017.
I was overworked, had 3 startups, a marriage I wasn’t nurturing, and anxiety that was peaking to the point where I couldn’t communicate without feeling frustration & anger.
This unsustainable approach to my life didn’t last long and eventually my marriage dissolved, my startup placed me on indefinite sabbatical, and I had become the one thing I swore I wouldn’t become, my Father — gotta love that awful truth.
The hardest part of my journey was finding which direction to face, I felt like a spinning compass trying to find a root for my issues. I needed to solve me and I wanted to work through my problems so I could become a better man, so I could take control away from my anxiety and anger.
The pieces I found worked for me, and as I worked on them they uncovered another ugly piece that I needed to face. But the one thing that started it all, the most important piece, was personal responsibility and something called the Locus of Control.
It’s not faith, it’s not fluffy bullshit. It’s something you’re very familiar with and you’re going to sit with it, ponder it, and own it when you’re done because it starts with you. It was always us and I would rather be the problem because I can fix me.